Who's Who of Veronica Mars — L
- L., Boyd
Member of Mr. Pope's FBLA class. In the stock market game race, he falls somewhere in between Veronica Mars and Cassidy Casablancas, which invokes images of a cute and tiny person. Alas, one look into their classroom belies that theory in 2.15 "The Quick and the Wed."
-grimsqueaker- L. Fenmore
- See Fenmore, L.
- L. Menendez
- See Menendez, L.
- La Paz
One of several of Desmond Fellows' nicknames for Piz. Desmond is nothing if not geographically accurate — La Paz is the capital of Bolivia. El Piz, however, can't even capitalize on the number of chicks Desmond almost gets naked when Deputy Sacks busts up the skinny dipping in 3.17 "Debasement Tapes."
-starxdsparrow- Lacey
Whiteboard tagger. She was at Bonnie's door, and apparently, she was smiling about it. Lacey spreads the love in 3.12 "There's Got To Be A Morning After Pill."
-starxdsparrow- Lacey, Becky
Neptune High student and not, we think, a parrot. When a skeptical Lilly informs her friends that Becky is trying out for school mascot, Veronica and Duncan just don't believe it in 1.06 "Return of the Kane."
-Inigo
All bios: 1.16 1.06- Lachey, Nick
A boy band
retardsinger who was married to Jessica Simpson for a brief but memorable period. Why memorable? Because they recorded every moment right after their idiotic wedding for an idiotic reality show called Newlyweds. They were bothretardedmentally challenged, so when it came out that they were splitting, no one (not even amoebas in the sea with no concept of television or human life) was surprised. Veronica, however, feigns it about this shocking! development in 2.11 "Donut Run."-alliterator- Laertes
In Shakespeare's Hamlet, he is the son of the slain-by-mistake Polonius, the brother of the suicidal Ophelia, and the foil to Hamlet, until he and Hamlet kill each other. If Logan and Weevil had jumped into Lilly's open grave to fight over who loved her more, they could have been modern counterparts of the tragic young men. Instead, the 09er and the biker just observe the quick and the dead in English class in 1.07 "The Girl Next Door."
-Inigo
All bios: 1.12 1.07- Lainie Minkoff
- See Minkoff, Lainie
- Lamb, Dawn
Veronica alias as assistant to the District Attorney. There are no accidents in Neptune, so we must wonder at the significance of Veronica's choice in adopting the sheriff's name. Could it be that those birds that appear whenever he is near will to him her endear by end of the school year? Dawn dons Don's mantle to find the plotters amongst the Cotters in 2.02 "Driver Ed."
-Inigo- Lamb, Sheriff Don
- Lance Armstrong
- See Armstrong, Lance
- Landers, Doris
Class Sweetheart, in more ways than one (nudge, nudge, wink, wink). Evelyn puts up a photo of the old tart for the Class of '79 reunion in 1.07 "The Girl Next Door."
-Inigo- Landers, Natalie
Neptune High student. Like Mr. Pope would say, sometimes you are in the pink and sometimes you are in the red: one year, Natalie has to offer make-out sessions for cigarette money, the next she drives a fancy sports car financed by a two million dollar payout her family was granted in a lawsuit against Woody Goodman. No wonder the death of her sister Rhonda in the bus crash doesn't seem to weigh all that heavy on her mind in 2.18 "I Am God."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Skyler Shaye.- Landers, Rhonda
Late Neptune student. Late as in dead, not late as in not on time. If she were not on time, she would have missed the bus and still be alive. So if she'd been late, she wouldn't be late. Her friend Michelle Thompson is late (as in not on time) in picking up the phone, so she doesn't get to speak to the soon-to-be-late Rhonda as she's laughing at the Betina-scorned, dickless Dick or plunging off a cliff. Hear her not-so-famous last words in 2.05 "Blast from the Past" and meet her poor white trash sister — who's suddenly not so poor after a post-crash two mil payoff from Woody's Burger empire — in 2.18 "I Am God."
-Inigo, Polter-Cow
All bios: 2.18 2.05
Played by Audra J Morgan.- Landon, Mr.
Someone whom the Griffiths called on the phone. Was it Michael Landon who played Charles Ingalls on Little House on the Prairie? Probably not, since he died over ten years ago. Then again, one never knows in Neptune. Dr. Tom and Hannah might be getting ghostly phone calls in 2.14 "Versatile Toppings."
-alliterator- Landry, Brewer
The wizened grandfather of Professor Hank Landry. Sadly for Hank, being wizened is not the same as being a wizard, even if one has the name of one. Seriously, doesn't Brewer Landry sound like he should be in the common room with Wilkie Twycross and Remus Lupin? Brewer could have waved a wand from his home in Florida and given Mindy water wings in 3.15 "Papa's Cabin."
-Inigo- Landry, Professor Hank
- Lang, Mr.
Name on a blackboard. The English teacher of Hannah Griffith? A long-lost relative of Lana Lang? Or yet another of the rampant graffiti writers haunting Neptune High? The mystery is killing us in 2.14 "Versatile Toppings."
-grimsqueaker
|
- LaRoche, Eddie "The Worm"
Aka the Worm. This sad little man videotapes girls and then goes home and... [Editor's note: This is a family site!] Right. See for yourselves in 1.11 "Silence of the Lamb."
-Inigo
Played by Aaron Paul.- Larry
One of Trish and Kurt's "artist" "friends." Given the "quality" of Larry's "artwork," it should offend Trish greatly that he uses her likeness as his muse. It also shouldn't be too surprising to discover that he "borrowed" Kurt's playbook to ensure some "lucky" bets on the football game, suddenly making it a lot easier to pay his tuition bill. Larry finds himself unexpectedly short on paint money when Veronica thwarts his plans in 3.03 "Wichita Linebacker."
-fulfilled
Played by Erik Eidem.- Larry Crawford
- See Crawford, Larry
- Larry Heinrich
- See Heinrich, Larry
- Larry King
- See King, Larry
- Lars
- LaRue, Chesty
An incarnation of Veronica who is not flat, just as God made her. Good name, Veronica! Try it for two weeks. If you're not satisfied, you can be Busty St. Claire. Still no? Fine, Hootie McBoob it is. At least this way, you're married to Max Power in 2.05 "Blast from the Past."
-Polter-Cow- Lauder, Estée
Cosmetics queen. Would her products have sold quite so well under her real name? Can one really imagine Veronica saying anyone had spent $100 on a lip enhancer at Josephine Esther Mentzer? Shallowness and the French name are all in 2.05 "Blast from the Past."
-Inigo- Lauper, Cyndi
Big-in-the-eighties pop star well known for kooky haircuts. Lianne tries to divert Veronica's interrogation by reliving Girls Just Wanna Have Fun in 1.16 "Betty and Veronica."
-Inigo- Laura Hildebrand
- See Hildebrand, Laura
- Laura Mickon Nickols
- See Nickols, Laura Mickon
- Laura Renato
- See Renato, Laura
- Lauren
Logan as a girl. You've seen those little skips, hops and jumps. What else can explain the boy's gayness? And all because Rosie Perez gave him a purse. The truth comes out of the closet in 1.10 "An Echolls Family Christmas."
-Inigo- Lauren Goff
- See Goff, Lauren
- Lauren Sinclair
- See Sinclair, Lauren
- Laurie Zaks
- See Zaks, Laurie
- Lavigne, Avril
Singer. Having heard her cover of "Knocking on Heaven's Door," that description may be inaccurate. That's right. The description had ears and listened. Then it ran away, screaming. Veronica and Wanda Varner plan a pep squad nostalgia-fest with one of Avril's CDs in 1.06 "Return of the Kane."
-Inigo- Lavoie, Ethan
- Law, Johnny
Vinnie's name for the coppers. Apparently, they don't know what he's got. We think it's probably chlamydia in 2.22 "Not Pictured."
-Polter-Cow- Law, Jude
Actor. Kinda hot. We know she likes hot guys, so it's no surprise to find out he is Lilly's type in 1.13 "Lord of the Bling."
-Inigo- Lawrence Givens
- See Givens, Lawrence
- Lawrence Patrick McCaber
- See McCaber, Lawrence Patrick
- Lawrence Vandegraff
- See Vandegraff, Lawrence
- Leahy, Jaime
One of the boys from Woody's Little League team. He stands next to Woody during the photo shoot. Psst, Jaime, you might want to keep a eye out on where Woody places his hand in 2.22 "Not Pictured."
-wyk- Lebowski, Jeffrey
Title character of the movie The Big Lebowski. You may figure the parallels out for yourself: This Jeffrey Lebowski is a millionaire and a fraud, he is married to a much younger gold-digging bimbo of a wife, and his estranged kid is much smarter than he is. Coincidences? Veronica and Duncan watch inspirational movies in 2.07 "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner."
-grimsqueaker- LeBron James
- See James, LeBron
|
- Lee, Mrs.
- Lee
Owner of Lee's Walk-In Donuts, Neptune's answer to Al's Pancake World. We're not entirely sure what the nature of his establishment is. Does he make donuts so large you can walk into them? If you walk in, do you get a donut? Is there no drive-thru? And can someone with a law degree explain what in tarnation a lien is? Cliff brings up having helped Veronica put one against the donut shop in 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-Polter-Cow- Lee, Bill
An old friend of Woody Goodman, who also happens to have both the first names of the Adamas. Coincidence? Well, okay, probably. Bill
"Husker""Apollo"Lee also advises Kendall on the millions she has from the Phoenix Land Trust in 2.22 "Not Pictured."-alliterator
Played by Michael Crider.- Lee, Bruce
Actor and martial arts...artist. He's one of Norris's choices for bomb shelter companion and, in full living color, graces his bedroom door in 1.18 "Weapons of Class Destruction."
-Inigo- Lee, Mr.
He's Parker's dad, a square old sot, gets Parker sad with summer plot. Job in mail room better to do than risk the doom of colds and flu? Billy or Ben? Norman or Chuck? Freddie or Len? Who gives a
? Killjoys abound here and in 3.18 "I Know What You'll Do Next Summer." -Inigo
Played by William Bumiller.- Lee, Parker
- Lee, Sara
Maker of tasty pound cake and other confections. Sara Lee's rather confident slogan claims that nobody doesn't like her. Forever cementing the partnership between sweets and undergarments, Sara Lee is also the parent company of Playtex and Hanes, products that Kendall is no doubt familiar with but may not be using, given the jiggling in 3.01 "Welcome Wagon."
-bethgee- Legris, Chanter
A fratboy for Pi Sigma with a weirdly awesome name. Is he French? Does he chant? We finally understand Henry Beecher's last words, "Here comes a mystery," in 2.16 "The Rapes of Graff."
-alliterator- Leisa Byley
- See Byley, Leisa
- Lennon, John
One half of the most influential song-writing duo in history, one quarter of the most influential band in history, and one eenth of the victims of murder by gunshot in the U.S.A. What you got with John was a real working-class hero. It was just like starting over after the band's demise, and he embarked on a solo career, taking one day at a time. John and Yoko, his second wife, lived in New York City, advocated power to the people, and campaigned for the world to give peace a chance. It's so hard to imagine what mind games faded rock star Desmond Fellows was playing with Keith in denying the influence of John and the Beatles. Hold on! You can't do that! God, Desmond! How do you sleep at nights? Only people crippled inside can be such scumbags. Desmond was a jealous guy in 3.17 "Debasement Tapes."
-Inigo- Lenny Sofer
- See Sofer, Lenny
- Leno, Jay
Late-night talk show host. Did you ever wonder why his voice rises three octaves when he asks questions? And here's a headline: his voice gets low and almost sultry when he's setting up a joke. But isn't it strange that his voice goes up again right after he delivers the punch line? Funnyman Leno once used Trina Echolls's name in his monologue. Logan is able to laugh about it in 3.04 "Charlie Don't Surf."
-topanga- Lenova, Catherine
Aka Yelena Sukarenko, Russian client of Mars Investigations. Do not ask why there are four different ways of saying/writing her name. We've discussed it to death. We've heard all the arguments. We each have our view. They are all here. It's Caterina/Catherine. Or maybe it's Katerina/Katherine. Oh, who cares? As for the character, far from being in search of a soulmate, this sly creature has a very different reunion planned for poor old Tom Cruz in 1.15 "Ruskie Business."
-Inigo
Played by Cynthia Lamontagne.- Deputy Leo D'Amato
- Leo Tolstoy
- See Tolstoy, Leo
- Leon
Mechanical engineering student who vaaants to suuuck your blooooood. Or so his supervisor would have Veronica believe when she needs his cryptography expertise, since Leon's work habits are primarily nocturnal. Of course, when you're a graduate student wedged into a windowless basement office, your sense of time tends to go a little wonky, and it certainly doesn't help with the pastiness. Or, um, so I've heard. Leon either curses his windowless existence or has an abnormal fear of garlic toast in 3.19 "Weevils Wobble But They Don't Go Down."
-misskiwi
Played by Jerry Shea.- Leonardo Fibonacci
- See Fibonacci, Leonardo
- LeonyPony
Poster on the Pirate's S.H.I.P. board. This person's thread title could refer to a lot of possible contents, but with our minds firmly planted in the gutter, we are guessing the descriptions of that first special moment are either poetical, crude, or baseball metaphors. Frank discussion might take place on the Pirate's S.H.I.P. board in 2.14 "Versatile Toppings."
-grimsqueaker- Leroy
A name and a number in a matchbook. Lilly created it to get at Celeste. Veronica recalls more life with Lilly in 1.22 "Leave It to Beaver."
-Inigo- Leroy "Encyclopedia" Brown
- See Brown, Leroy "Encyclopedia"
- Leroy Wright
- See Wright, Leroy
- Leskey, Carrie Ann
Alumni of the Class of 1979. This former Miss California is now forty pounds heavier. Is that why she is being welcomed to the "ass of '79" in 1.07 "The Girl Next Door"?
-Inigo- Leslie Dumass
- See Dumass, Leslie
- Leslie Feist
- See Feist, Leslie
- Lester Neal
- See Neal, Lester
- Leticia "Letty" Navarro
- See Navarro, Leticia "Letty"
- Letters Organize
Hardcore punk band. Yeeeeeeaaaaaahhh!!!! Letters letters organize!!! I like to take my letters and I put them in an order like the %&#$ing alphabet now I'm running for the border! Seriously, kids, you sound like a bunch of rebel secretaries. How did your poster earn a coveted spot on the KRFF door in 3.17 "Debasement Tapes"?
-Polter-Cow- Lev
Member of a completely legitimate business establishment. Moider? Who said anything about moider? Those two bodies, they, uh, fell offa da truck. The thing with the woodshop and the heavy garbage bags is got nuthin' to do with nuthin'. My associate and I were merely...cleaning up after some rats. Didn't nobody get whacked. Who you talkin' to? I said, who you talkin' to? Was it my weasel of a nephew? I bet he's got a big mouth in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-misskiwi- Levi Stinson
- See Stinson, Levi
- Levine, Adam
A moderator who's no Clark Kent when it comes to investigative journalism, although she does deal in secret identities. Previously acting as a reporter, she now moderates an exciting election debate! In a future episode, she may fly around the world and turn back time. For now, however, she just has to deal with the fact that she's a Girl Named Adam. Perhaps she writes angst-filled poetry about it and perhaps it looks something like this:
I was skilled in moderation
During the debate actualization
And Keith's discombobulation
With Lamb's accusation.
Though I could have used more alliteration
In 2.05 Blast from the Past(eurization).-alliterator, Polter-Cow
Played by Lee Ann Kim.- Levine, Dr. Al
- Levine, Jodie
Girl at Gia's party. She might be the one comparing butts with Madison Sinclair. Or the one who is sucking up to Madison by complimenting her butt over the first girl's. We don't know, exactly. Not that we would care, either, since everyone doing anything with Madison is, like, way beneath us. Yes, that means you, Dick. Not Gia, though, since Gia is just hanging out with Madison because she's new and doesn't know better, and also because she's a ditz. But we like her. Jodie probably couldn't care less about what we think, though, so she's dead to us in 2.07 "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Kendall Rose.- Levine, Liz
A Homecoming Queen nominee. Al Levine's daughter? Adam Levine's sister? We honestly don't know in 2.05 "Blast from the Past."
-alliterator- Lew Kalt
- See Kalt, Lew
- Lewis, Melissa
Candidate for president in the 2004/05 student council elections. Now here's a thing. Being a sister, she got Wallace's vote. But Laura Hildebrand is a sister too, if "sister" means what we think it does. So either, Wallace observed some fine distinction between the two that we ain't seeing, or else Madison Sinclair tampered with the cast credits as well as the ballot instructions in 1.06 "Return of the Kane."
-Inigo- Liam
Con artist and computer genius. With Grant Winters, he scams money from suckers to fund the software development of a video game that is set to shake the earth's foundations. What is it with geeks and hyperbole? He gets his comeuppance in 1.04 "The Wrath of Con."
-Inigo
Played by Robert Baker.- Liam Fitzpatrick
- Liamator
One of the gaming club screen names. It would make sense that it is Liam's nom de geek but in another scene he appears to be Coppertop. Go "Huh?" with us in 1.04 "The Wrath of Con."
-Inigo- Lianne Mars
- LifeIsABeach
Onscreen chat name. It is used by Veronica pretending to be Kimmy who wants to be Meg who is wrongfully accused of being a slut by her purer-than-Snow White boyfriend who turns out to be a pig. The chat is chatty in 1.08 "Like a Virgin."
-wyk- Lightfoot, Gordon
Singer. His Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald is awesome. That's why Keith is so happy to have some of his LPs as a throw-in with the water bed in 1.09 "Drinking the Kool-Aid."
-Inigo- Lightning Mike
Homeless man from Balboa Park. Logan recruits him for his bum fights in his misguided attempt to win Time magazine's Man-of-the-Year cover. The amateur boxing takes off in 1.06 "Return of the Kane."
-Inigo- Lil Wacker
- See Wacker, Lil
- Lilly Kane
- Lilly Manning
- See Manning, Lilly
- Limo Driver
Unfortunately, this long-lost twin of Captain Kangaroo doesn't have Wallace's skills for driving a getaway car and gets Wallace busted in 2.12 "Rashard & Wallace Go To White Castle."
-topanga
Played by Ben DiGregorio.- Linda
Caterer to the Hearst College reception. She serves information seasoned with light snark, in the proud tradition of caterers interviewed by private detectives named Mars. That's really all we learn about Linda in 3.08 "Lord of the Pi's."
-grimsqueaker
Played by Linda Bailey Walsh.- Linda Goldman
- See Goldman, Linda
- Lindbergh baby
Kidnapped and murdered son of flying hero and possible part-time Nazi Charles Lindbergh. Veronica is way too young to be involved in this tragic cause celebré of 1932, so is the baby really what Lamb is searching for in her locker in 1.12 "Clash of the Tritons"?
-Inigo- Lindsay, Herbert
Castle member, class of 1934. His confession? His name isn't actually Herbert Lindsay. His given name was so horrible and embarrassing that in 1928, he legally changed it, only later realizing that he should have picked a name like Orville (which was considered cool back in 1934). What name could be worse than "Herbert Lindsay," you ask? Well, I'd tell you, but hasn't the poor guy been through enough having to go through life as "Herbert Lindsay" in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back"?
-misskiwi- Lindsey Wrangler
- See Wrangler, Lindsey
- Lionnel Feilspar
- See Feilspar, Lionnel
- Lisa
A Veronica alias, a sorority skank. Crabs, Veronica? What with crab puffs at the Echolls funeral wake and Veronica's attempt to find Ben Bloom, those little guys are all over the place in 1.13 "Lord of the Bling."
-Inigo- Lisa #2
The name on the whiteboard opposite Mac's and Parker's room. Is Bart's sister all grown up and going to college now? Is Lisa Kudrow slumming it? Or perhaps she's just some random girl named Lisa. Okay, that's probably it in 3.01 "Welcome Wagon."
-alliterator- Lisa #3
Message leaver for Anthony Martin. Probably not as smart as Simpson, as hip as Loeb, or as mysterious as Mona, this Lisa is looking for Anthony in 3.12 "There's Got To Be A Morning After Pill."
-bethgee- Lisa #4
Hot MySpace girl with an intelligence that belies her having a MySpace page. Dick thinks he is onto a good thing when he invites her and another chick as his date to Parker's birthday party whereupon he can check out which is hotter before dumping the other one. His plan succeeds beyond his wildest dreams when the two meet and promise him Doublemint heaven. Of course, they're kidding. Unlike Dick, the girls are not fools and, being Internet friends, knew from the start what he was up to. They dump his sorry ass, leaving him only with a bucket of ice for comfort in 3.16 "Un-American Graffiti."
-Inigo
Played by Amy Main.- Lisa Murphy
- Lisa Marie Presley
- See Presley, Lisa Marie
- Professor Lisa Tonin
- See Tonin, Professor Lisa
- The Little Ones
Jaunty indie popsters from California. They subscribe to Uncle Lee's Rule of Feet, to whit: "a song was deemed appropriate if, and only if each of the Little Ones' feet could shuffle." The crayon-esque cover of their Sing Song EP graces the walls of Hearst College Radio's outer office, amongst the punksters and the rocksters and the down-and-dirty clubsters in 3.06 "Hi, Infidelity." A track from it, "Lovers Who Uncover," is the musical accompaniment to Kama Sutra contortions in 3.14 "Mars, Bars."
-Inigo
All bios: 3.14 3.06- Little Orphan Annie
- See Annie, Little Orphan
- Lizette
Hooker who made a quick grand at the Neptune Grand. She's a full-service escort, willing to take on both Logan and Veronica. It might come at cost, but Logan doesn't seem to mind the extra cash. She was the uncalled-for call girl in 3.11 "Poughkeepsie, Tramps and Thieves."
-starxdsparrow
Played by Julia Lehman.- Lizzie Manning
- Lloyd Blankenship
- Lobo, Leonard
- Logan Fields
- See Fields, Logan
- Logan Echolls
- Lohman, Alison
Actress. Young, blonde, and moving up in Hollywood. Kind of like Kirsten Dunst, but with credibility. No offense to Ms. Dunst, but she's the one with Bring It On on her résumé. In recent years, Ms. Lohman has worked with Atom Egoyan, Tim Burton, and Ridley Scott. Her Scott project, Matchstick Men, makes an appearance in poster form in 2.04 "Green-Eyed Monster."
-Polter-Cow- Lois
Clarence Wiedman's assistant. She gets his calls and tends his plants in 1.16 "Betty and Veronica."
-Inigo- Lola
Dognapped canine. Veronica rescues Kristen Bell's dog in 1.19 "Hot Dogs."
-Inigo- Lola #2
A dog on a poster on a computer screen. Probably based on Kristen Bell's real-life dog, Lola witnesses the first recorded business meeting of Mac and Beaver. This should be the beginning of a beautiful friendship in 2.09 "My Mother, the Fiend."
-grimsqueaker- Lolita
A character in a book by Vladimir Nabokov about an older man obsessed with a teenage seductress. Veronica's imitation is more Valley-girlish, so she would be Whoa-lita. Though perhaps with the sadness she feels, she would be Woe-lita. Or maybe with her new position at Mars Investigations, she would be Quid-Pro-Quo-lita. Or Apropos-lita. Hey, if she were a Star Wars fan, she would be A-Long-Long-Time-Ago-lita! Okay, that's enough. Veronica
is the light of my fire, fire of my loinsshows her seductress side in 2.04 "Green-Eyed Monster."-alliterator- London
Veronica's alter-ego. In that
ridiculousgreat tradition that gives us Chelsea Clinton, Brooklyn Beckham and Paris Hilton, Veronica tells Wallace Fennel that she has adopted the name and grown four inches in the nineteen hours since she last sent him an email. Does this mean that Keith and Lianne honeymooned in England's fair capital? Was Jake Kane there too? And really, canVeronicaLondon be surprised that Wallace isn't responding when all she ever talks about is "me, me, ME"? No response is forthcoming, even to this staggering news, in 2.07 "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner."-Inigo- London, Jack
Author of Call of the Wild and other butch books. Ruff ruff. Ruff ruff ruff, ruff. Yap-yap-yap. *sniff* Ruff ruff, ruff ruff; yappity yap. Slurp slurp slurp. Bow-wow-wow-wow. *pisssssssssss* Yelp! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff: ruff. Yeow yeow yeow yeow? Grrrrrrrrrrr. *lick balls* Ruff ruff yip 3.03 "Wichita Linebacker."
-Inigo- Lonely Telescope Guy
Completely average Logan fangirlPervert. Logan thinks his Peeping Tom neighbor is just yearning for him to take his shirt off, but we assume he is simply bed-ridden, bored, and hoping that if he only waits long enough, yet another Echolls will slay his lover, but this time right before his watchful lens in 3.04 "Charlie Don't Surf."-grimsqueaker- Long, P.W.
Man with a band. Three bands, even: Wig, Mule, and Reelfoot. Guess that's appropriate for the three-named Preston Wright Long. So the man with three names forms three bands with one name. Thus, the Conservation of Names is upheld in 3.11 "Poughkeepsie, Tramps and Thieves."
-Polter-Cow- Long, Webster
Titular character of a 1980s TV sitcom that starred Emmanuel Lewis. According to the Neptune tabloids, Webster was rumored to be in discovered in the Neverland basement. Poor Emmanuel. A long time ago, he starred in a show, but we haven't thought of you lately at all. Come on now, shorty. Bring it on, bring it on, yeah. Just remember him in 2.09 "My Mother, the Fiend."
-wyk- The Loons
Band. They're just another mile away with their face out of phase in the ballroom of the unawake. The cry of the madman means friends forever and you won't be the fool. Mike is a lonely friend with their poster in his wall in 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-alliterator- Lopez, Jennifer
Singer, actress and entrepreneur. A ten foot high picture of J-Lo would be Weevil's poster of choice to decorate his cell. So Weevil is both a breast man (Lilly) and a butt man (J-Lo)? Damn. No wonder he and Logan never got together. Though he does share the same taste as Hector. Weevil wishes for girlie butt in 1.19 "Hot Dogs" and Hector has some on his calendar in 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-Inigo, alliterator
All bios: 2.06 1.19- Lorenzo
Pilates trainer of Kendall Casablancas. Can he keep up with her marvelous energy? We don't find out in 2.03 "Cheatty Cheatty Bang Bang."
-grimsqueaker- Loretta Cancun
- See Cancun, Loretta
- Lorne Van Mea
- See Van Mea, Lorne
- Lorre, Peter
Actor best known for his playing of murky Europeans in '40s and '50s film noir. Oh, and Mr. Moto. Peter Lorre was a Hungarian Jew who fled the land of his birth for Hollywood, via London and Hitchcock's The Man Who Knew Too Much. It was the accent — and the face and eyes of a smushed Chihuahua puppy — that made him such a hit, and such a favorite with impersonators the world over. The genie in Aladdin wouldn't have been half so cool without Robin Williams doing Lorre. Keith is right; if they were all like Peter Lorre, who played Joel Cairo in The Maltese Falcon, his job would be a little more interesting. But might I remind you, Mr. Mars, that gardenia-scented business cards and silver canes can make for headaches, moral ambiguity, double-crosses, and temper tantrums, all things Keith looks to avoid, with varying degrees of success in 3.06 "Hi, Infidelity."
-Inigo- Louganis, Greg
An Olympic diver who won five medals, four of them gold, during the '80s, Greg Louganis was also notorious outside the swimming pool, coming out of the closet and revealing that he was HIV-positive in his 1995 autobiography. Logan compares Beaver's swan dive off the top of the Neptune Grand to one of Greg Louganis' medal-winning performances in 3.01 "Welcome Wagon."
-fulfilled- Louie
Bridget's toy spaniel. Veronica rescues the dog and traps the nappers in 1.19 "Hot Dogs."
-Inigo- Louis
Roommate of Domonick Desante. According to the whiteboard on his door, Louis [heart]'s you if you're single, has a friend named "Lovebone" who wants to "ride the creep train," and has a roommate whose hobbies include forwarding Internet porn. Louis sounds like a stand-up individual in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-misskiwi- Louisa Cetlingsworth
- See Cetlingsworth, Louisa
- Louise
Main character in the film Thelma and Louise. Logan cleverly detects the inspiration for Cliff's cover story in 2.06 "Rat Saw God."
-grimsqueaker- Louise #2
Parker's aunt and summertime distraction. We don't learn much about this poor woman — is she Parker's dad's sister or her mom's? Or her mom's brother's wife? Or her dad's first cousin whom she merely refers to as "aunt"? Maybe it's a great-aunt or a family friend? We'll never find out, but we do know a weeks-long trip to wherever she lives isn't high on Parker's summertime priority list in 3.18 "I Know What You'll Do Next Summer."
-bethgee- Lout 1
Lout (obviously) who makes lewd comments in Veronica and Piz's direction after their Internet porn debut. In place of "Lout 1," we would also have accepted "Loudmouth Jerkwad 3," "Gross Fratboy 74," "Pervert 19," and "Guy Veronica Wants to Taser 739" in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-misskiwi
Played by Brian Norris.- Lovebone
Left a message on Louis's board. His name means he's either:
a) an archaeology major,
b) a dog like Wishbone (although he would have to have opposable thumbs to use a pen), or
c) someone with a very dirty mind.
Considering "Lovebone" is friends with the roommate of Gorya "Gory" Sorokin, wants to "ride the creep train," and uses atrocious grammar, we have to guess c) in 3.20 "The Bitch Is Back."
-alliterator- Tommy "Lucky" Dohanic
- Lucky Pierre
Zere are many Lucky Pierres. Zere's zee Lucky Pierre of movie fame, who zaw naked wemen everywhere. Zere's zee Lucky Pierre which is a meesterious maker of music. Zere's zee reely Lucky Pierre who iz zee filling of a sexy, no, sex zandwhich. Zen zere iz zee Lucky Pierre who was mentioned in a reely famos musical wheech iz on zee teep of my tong.... Zo, which Lucky Pierre retired to a jewellery store in Neptune and has embezzling employez *spit*? Maybe Veenie knows in 3.01 "Welcome Wagon."
-Inigo- Lucy Franks
- See Franks, Lucy
- Lucy Ricardo
- See Ricardo, Lucy
- Lucy Smith
- See Smith, Lucy
- Ludden, Johnny
One of the boys from Woody's Little League team. After confirming that he is one of the boys in the Little League photo, Johnny immediately asks Veronica about the free gelato. A cute blonde smelling of marshmallows and promises goes through all the trouble of tracking you down, and all you can think of is gelato?! Exactly how many members of that little league team are gay in 2.22 "Not Pictured"?
-wyk
Played by Scott Knight.- Luddington, Robin
One of the boys from Woody's Little League team. Robin doesn't exactly look thrilled, does he? Is it because 1) his coach is a sick bastard, 2) his baseball uniform is partially pink, or 3) his parents named him after a homoerotic action hero sidekick in 2.22 "Not Pictured"?
-wyk- Luigi
Owns that Italian place. You know the one. The one where Veronica once ate her weight in manicotti. A fact that would be much more impressive if the petite Veronica didn't weigh next to nothing. Come to think of it, isn't that one of those little facts that she doesn't want shared? Keith shared. Is that why she is looking at him like that in 1.05 "You Think You Know Somebody"?
-wyk- Luis
- Luke
- Luke Duke
- See Duke, Luke
- Lulu
Veronica's imaginary Catahoula Leopard dog. Lulu gambols on the beach with Steve and the chemistry is electric but it all comes to nought. Um. Beach. Chemistry. Nought. Is Veronica foreshadowing her own life in 1.15 "Ruskie Business"?
-Inigo- Luna, Cervando
PCHer and Neptune High student who died in the bus crash, although his last name has been shown as both Perez and Esparza. We think that's just a cover for his real real last name: Lovegood. Makes sense, doesn't it? Cervando doesn't howl at the moon (probably because he's dead) in 2.02 "Driver Ed," 2.04 "Green-Eyed Monster," and 2.18 "I Am God."
-alliterator
Played by Maximino Arciniega, Jr..- Lunchpail, José
Logan's term of endearment for Weevil. Oh, come on! You know those two are truly, madly, deeply in love in 3.05 "President Evil."
-Inigo- Lung, Mr.
Neptune High School teacher. What does he teach? What does he look like? Could he possibly be cooler than Mr. Wu? We learn the answers to none of these questions in 2.07 "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner."
-Polter-Cow- Lynn Echolls
- Lynn Fuller
- See Fuller, Lynn
- Lynyrd Skynyrd
Southern rock band with an abnormal fear of vowels and a justifiable fear of flying. According to Lianne, their music goes with hot dogs and tater tots in 1.22 "Leave It to Beaver."
-Inigo